Lillian'Snape
by SoLongFareWell
Summary: ..Chapter 5 is now up... A possible past relationship between Lily Evans and Severus Snape, explaining why he hates her son so much today. Deciving, romantic, infatuations, tragic circumstances. R
1. Chapter 1:

Severus Snape Journal Entry, September 28th - night  
  
"Again I see her with her, without her noticing. Today she is happier than usual. Gryffindor won last night's game against Hufflepuff in the qudditch match. I was able to share her joy in secrecy, since I have never really cared for Hufflepuff or their team. As much as I would hate to see her smile depart, I will be very put out if Slytherin is beaten by those goons.  
  
She walked by me today. Her hair smelt of wonders I cannot even begin to describe.   
  
She noticed me for only a brief moment, until that damn Potter got in the way.   
  
Never have I met a more shallow and undeserving rat. His physical strength may outbeat my own, but she'll see through that. She's no fool, and Potter will only push her further away.   
  
...besides... he could never love her as I do..."  
  
Hogwarts School, September 29th - day  
  
Lily sat in her potions class. The curtains were drawn making the room incredibly dark, only lit by the few candles by the professor's desk. Lily never really cared for this class. The professor droned on and on in the most monotone voice possible, and tried to act like he was much more mysterious than he really was. The school already knew that his favorite color was periwinkle and that he owned a bunny named Clover.  
  
She sat staring out in the general direction of where the professor was instructing, but wasn't really looking at anything. Her quill moved around slowly making little spirals and curls around the parchment.  
  
When the class was over, and the students behind her left, she started to put her things back in her bag. She grabbed the parchment she had been doodling on, and gasped at what she had written.  
  
Little swirly letters that spelt out: Severus.  
  
What was it about him? She thought to herself. She had admitted to herself that he was not very attractive, or social... yet something about the way that whenever she noticed him, he had already noticed her. Something about the way his eyes looked at hers. She couldn't explain it. It was as though he was longing to tell her something, but never spoke to her.  
  
Then there was James. To everyone else, James was it. He was popular, on the Quidditch team as a seeker, and adored by all the girls.  
  
All but Lily. She couldn't stand how proud he was all the time, or how he picked on people for no reason... How he treated Severus was the last straw for Lily.  
  
She had witnessed quite enough times for her liking of James being nothing but nasty towards the pale and shy boy. True that Severus had never shown emotion to anyone, but surely he didn't deserve to be patronized.  
  
When school was finally done, Lily headed to the Gryffindor tower. She passed by a group of giggling girls who were all huddled around a flyer for the school dance coming up. She turned the corner, and saw Severus sitting on a windowsill. He sat looking out the window with a notebook propped on his knees. Lily stopped in her tracks. She just stood there, watching him. His black, sorrowful eyes moved slowly around the grounds below, watching students walking around the lake, or playing with bewitched frisbees. His jet black hair was long and thin, and he kept it back in a pony-tail at the base of his neck. His nose crooked downwards to his lightly closed mouth.   
  
It was the first time Lily had ever really looked at Severus. Not that she had not noticed him in the past, but it was quite different to notice him in class, or in the halls, than to see him on his own without any hint that anyone was watching him.  
  
Lily finally felt the urge to say something. How silly it was to ponder what he might be thinking about when she could easily just ask him! When suddenly, from behind them, Lily heard a familiar voice. "Lily! There you are! I was looking for you everywhere!" said James Potter.  
  
He smoothed his hair and adjusted his small glasses and gave a big grin. Severus pretended as though he didn't hear anything, and Lily wished she could vanish as easily into nothingness at that moment.  
  
"Hello James." Lily replied.  
  
"So, I was wondering why we haven't gone out yet?" James asked very confidently.  
  
"I don't know." said Lily dully.  
  
"How's tomorrow night?" James asked.  
  
Lily looked behind her at Severus, who was still gazing out the window. She knew he could hear them, and yet he showed no sign of acknowledgment to them.   
  
She felt a strange sensation to lie... for Severus' benefit, but the feeling of being wrong about him overruled her, and she agreed to go out with James tomorrow night.  
  
"Great!" said James gleefully. He gave Lily a teethy smile, and walked off to Gryffindor tower.  
  
All Lily could think about was how pointless a date with James would be. They'd be sitting there, and James would tell her how wonderful he is, and how much she should adore him the way that he adores himself.  
  
Lily would smile and nod, and proceed to toss ice cubes down his robes when he wasn't looking, insisting that the wait staff were having a mild food fight.  
  
She looked down at the floor, then back up at the window where Severus was, except that he was no longer there. Lily sighed, and headed to the common room. 


	2. Chapter 2: A Date With James

Severus Snape Journal Entry, September 29th - night   
  
Life can be evil. More times than not. I had retreated to the windowsill in the west corridor, where the view for people watching is prime. My thoughts had dwindled down to the few things he could never stop thinking about. The room had become silent, and my body numb... then that damn Potter came barreling down the hall, waking the dead with his shrill and resonant voice. If I had a Galleon for every time that boy said something completely mental, I'd be a millionaire.   
  
But what caught me off guard, was that he was calling to Lily...  
  
She must've been walking down the hall at that moment. He came in asking her for a date, just as I knew he would. Except, Lily didn't say no. She didn't see through him the way I had imagined she would. How can she stand to be around someone so emotionally attached to himself, and have no room left to love anyone else?  
  
But she said it... and I heard the whole thing. I saw her looking at the floor when Potter left through the reflection in the window. I couldn't bear it.   
  
Now I'm here, feeling sick to my stomach. I won't go to class like this.  
  
Diagon Alley, September 30th - evening  
  
Lily and James walked down the narrow streets of Diagon Alley in search of something entertaining for the both of them to do together. Lily would have taken it as somewhat of an insult that James had not even considered what they would actually DO on their date, but she found it relaxing to just walk. The evening air was crisp, but refreshing, and though James offered his cloak to her, she liked the feeling of the cool air on her arms.   
  
The shops were turning on their front lights, and the buildings were now blocking out the sunset beyond them. They turned into a quaint little bistro and to Lily's surprise, James had in fact made a reservation there. She couldn't help but giggle when they sat down.   
  
"That was pretty clever." She admitted.  
  
"I'm glad you enjoyed it." James replied.  
  
"What will you have?" the waiter asked.  
  
Lily hadn't even picked up a menu yet, but there was no need. James began spouting off several different dishes that were his personal favorites, and ordered a big pitcher of butter beer for them both. The waiter nodded and took their menus.   
  
Lily blinked.  
  
"Oh, I hope you don't mind that I ordered. I know you're just going to love them!" said James happily.  
  
Well then, Lily thought, this should be interesting...  
  
James didn't say much in between large gulps of butter beer. Lily would tease him when he would drink so much that the foam would leave a little mustache on his upper lip.   
  
By the time Lily poured herself a second cup of butter beer, James had already had 4, and the pitcher was filled not but a drop.  
  
Lily smiled weakly. The cuteness of James' beer mustache was wearing thin. This is going to be a long night...  
  
Hogwarts School - Gryffindor Common Room, September 30th - early morning  
  
Lily and her friend Onya sat in front of the fireplace after Lily's date with James.  
  
"So it must've been somewhat fun. I mean, you stayed out pretty late!" Onya commented after listening to Lily mumble things, trying to explain.  
  
"Eh, yeah, it wasn't bad." said Lily, bored.  
  
"Oh, come on! James is the cutest guy in school, and he asked you out! Tell me SOMETHING!" Onya begged. Lily knew that all of her friends dig James, and it humored her to think that the one person out of the lot that DIDN'T like him, was the one he asked out.  
  
"We were late because he got lost taking us back to Hogwarts." Lily explained. "And, he ended up drinking so much butter beer that he couldn't afford the meals he ordered."  
  
"HE ordered?" Onya asked.  
  
"Yes. He ordered them, I ate them, and I paid for them. He felt really bad afterwards, and I'm pretty sure that's why he got distracted and led us completely off track. I told him it was okay. I mean, it was. I didn't mind the spending of the money... but he hardly had anything to talk about... other than his own life... and when he wasn't talking, he was drinking or asking random wizards for directions." said Lily, and she sighed.  
  
"Oh." replied Onya.  
  
"No, really. It was pretty fun. I was distracted too." said Lily, thinking about something else again.  
  
"Why?" asked Onya.  
  
"Why what?" replied Lily.  
  
"Why were you distracted?" Onya asked, sitting up in her chair, interested.  
  
"Oh, er, school... and stuff."   
  
"Lily, I'd like to think I'm one of your close friends,"  
  
"You are!"  
  
"Then how come you never tell me anything you're thinking about? You can trust me."  
  
"I know... I'm just not sure I know what I'm thinking"  
  
"Well, try. I'll understand even if it doesn't come out right."  
  
"Oh... well, heh, I don't know..."  
  
"Please Lily. I'll tell you something I've not told anyone too."  
  
"Okay"  
  
"Remember last year when Remus was walking down the hall and his robes suddenly flew off and everyone saw that he forgot to wear a shirt that day?"  
  
"Haha, yeah, I remember that"  
  
"Well, Sirius told me that he had forgotten... so I was the one who jinxed his cloak to fly off."  
  
Lily errupted into a fit of giggles, and from the sight of her, Onya began laughing as well.  
  
"Haha, okay... okay, now it's your turn!"  
  
"Oh man... On, you're never going to believe this! I... haha, I've been secretly thinking about this guy..."  
  
"Ooo! Who?? Is he the one who was 'distracting' you while you were out with James?"  
  
"Yeah! Hahaha! I'll give you three guesses!"  
  
"Um, that dorky kid who sits next to us in Herbology?"  
  
"Wormtail!! NO! Hahaha!"  
  
"Ohh! Good! Let's see..."  
  
"I'll give you a hint though, he's not very social!"  
  
"Oh... lessie here... oh! Hahaha! I've got one that'll cook your goose!"  
  
"Who!?"  
  
"That freak-boy! What's his name? Sevie, Sven, Severus? Haha! That would be the day!"  
  
"Eh..."  
  
"Haha... ha... heh... ehh... what?"  
  
Lily cleared her throat uncomfortably.  
  
"Y, you like... Severus? Snape?"  
  
"Heh..."  
  
"Freak-boy?!"  
  
"He's not a freak! He's just quiet! And ever since James came up and made a spectacle by asking me out in the hall in front of him, he hasn't been in class, or in the halls, not even for lunch or dinner! I think he's probably a nice guy once you get to know him."  
  
"What are you talking about!? He's the devil's spawn for God's sake, Lily!"  
  
"Thank you very much for your warmth and support. Goodnight."  
  
With that, Lily ran out the portrait hole and away from the Gryffindor Tower.  
  
Why the hell did I tell her that? I knew she was a flake, and yet I told. Now the whole school will know, not that I'd care, and everyone will laugh at me, not that I'll listen, and I'll be rediculed for the rest of my being, not that I'd live an unhappy life.  
  
So what if I like a weird guy. Most men ARE weird! This one just happens to be more so than some. How can I say that? I don't even know what I'm talking about. All I've ever known about him is that he's quiet, which means he's probably very observant. By seeing him on the windowsill, just gazing, can only mean that he's a deep thinker. We'd have so much more to talk about than I did with Ja-  
  
Lily turned the corner, and there was Severus... sitting on the windowsill. Her mind went blank, and she just stood there, except this time, Severus noticed the sound of footsteps, and when she stopped he turned and looked.  
  
He couldn't stop his eyes from going heavy and making him turn away. He opened them and looked out the window again.  
  
Lily knew that if she didn't just talk to him now, she never would. What's the worst that could happen?  
  
She walked slowly to the windowsill.  
  
"Um," she muttered quietly. Severus looked from out the window to his knees, waiting for her to say something, or maybe just leave... as not to make his detestable thoughts about her and Potter together.  
  
Lily couldn't think of anything to say. What do you say to someone you don't really know, but are completely infatuated with? She felt her cheeks start to heat up, and her knuckles were white from clenching her fists.   
  
They waited in silence for each other to break the ice, and after what felt like an eternity, Lily turned on her heels and started to walk back to Gryffindor Tower... embarrassed.  
  
"Have a fun night with Potter?" called Severus.  
  
Lily turned around and faced Severus, who was now sitting on the windowsill with his legs dangling down towards the floor.  
  
"Not really." Lily replied truthfully. She noticed his eyebrows twitch, but quickly returned to their same expressionless position.  
  
Lily wasn't sure if he was planning to hold a conversation with her or not, but little by little she inched her way back to her original spot looking directly at the window he was sitting in.  
  
"I hear he's quite the lady's man." Severus said sarcastically.  
  
"Yeah, I hear that too." Lily sighed.  
  
"Didn't you think so on your little date?" he asked coldly.  
  
"We had a nice dinner, but overall, I didn't see anything that was worth 8 galleons." Lily said, leaning against a wall, and sliding down so she is now sitting on the stone floor.  
  
"8 galleons? You don't mean to tell me James made you pay for the date?" Severus said trying to keep a straight face, but ultimately amused at the thought.  
  
"Heh, he didn't mean it to happen. Too much butter beer."   
  
"I think that's the saddest thing I've ever heard"  
  
"Agreed"  
  
Severus tried hard to keep a straight face, and he was grateful for the moments Lily looked down at her lap, or out into the corridor so he could sneak a smile in.   
  
"May I inquire as to why you are wandering the halls at this time?" Severus asked in a most professional manner.  
  
"My, my, don't we sound like we're in charge?" Lily replied, a little more playful than she was expecting. "Well... what are YOU doing out so late?"  
  
"I believe I asked you first Miss Evans."  
  
"Uh, well, to be honest, I wasn't too happy with a conversation I was having, so I came out for a little walk."   
  
"I see."  
  
"So, what about you?"  
  
"I see no reason why I can't be here."  
  
"Are you meditating?"  
  
"Homework."  
  
"Oh."  
  
"...why? Did I look like I was meditating?"  
  
"Yes, sort of."  
  
"Oh."  
  
It was a long pause before Lily started to become cold from the stone floor, forcing her to strike up a conversation to keep her mind on something else.  
  
"Why did you miss class today?" she asked.  
  
"I wasn't feeling good."  
  
"Oh... sorry. Was it a headache?"  
  
"A little of everything."  
  
"Ouch. Well, you weren't in lunch or dinner either... did you eat anything today?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Well!" said Lily, getting to her feet. "That's the first problem! You can't go a day without eating! It's like a day without sunshine!"   
  
Lily took a good look at Severus' pale complexion.   
  
"Or something..." she added. "Come on, lets go find something to eat."  
  
Severus didn't move from his windowsill, and Lily got to the end of the hall before she realized she was not being followed. She turned around, walked to the windowsill, and reached out her hand.  
  
Severus just looked at it, as though it were a foreign object, not sure if he was allowed to touch.  
  
Finally Lily didn't feel like waiting anymore, so she grabbed his hand, and softly tugged on his arm until he stood.  
  
Severus followed Lily , hand in hers. 


	3. Chapter 3: A Night to Remember

Severus Snape Journal Entry, September 31st - morning  
  
"Last night's events were not to be believed. If I had told my past self that I would have experienced the night's particular sensations, there was not even the slightest chance of me falling for it. For starters, we must recap on exactly what happened after Lily took my hand and led me to the school kitchens..."  
  
With Lily's hand grasping Severus', leading him down stairs and through vacant corridors, they came to a portrait of fruit. Lily used her free hand to reach up and tickle the pear, who giggled and squirmed, until the portrait opened, revealing a door.   
  
"How on earth did you figure that out?" Severus asked, truly impressed.  
  
"Lucky guess" said Lily in a girlish way.  
  
When they walked through the door, dozens of little house elves were sprawled on the floor, sleeping.   
  
Two were awake, sitting by the fire place, and zapping a beetle as it waddled by.  
  
Lily walked to the house elves. When one noticed her, he stood quickly, and presented himself as though he were their butler.  
  
"What can we's get for you?" the house elf asked in a high pitched voice.  
  
"We're just a little hungry. Do you have any left overs from dinner?" Lily asked politely.  
  
Severus' hand dropped away from Lily's as he watched the house elf go to work, preparing two large plates of food for the both of them.   
  
When the house elf handed them their food, they thanked them graciously, and Lily led them back out of the portrait, and into the halls.   
  
Lily noticed the look on Severus' face, which was almost bewildered.  
  
"What's wrong?" she asked.  
  
"Nothing. I just never realized they used house elves to make the food." he replied.  
  
They continued down a long corridor, until they came to an empty class room. It was dimly lit with hovering candles, and portraits that were asleep in their frames.  
  
They took a seat in the back row table, and began with their small feast.  
  
Severus took huge spoon-fulls of food, eating so fast, it would give a person watching him a stomach ache!  
  
But it surprisingly didn't give Lily one. She knew he hadn't eaten all day, and that he was probably starving. The boy was skinny as it were. She figured he could use the meat.  
  
In a mid-bite, Severus set down his fork.  
  
"Thank you." he said, not looking at her.  
  
"You're welcome" she replied, leaning her face down to meet his eyes.  
  
He looked at her eyes, and at her lips. Her teeth that made her smile so perfect. Her red hair that was pulled back into a pony-tail like his own, but when little strands fell out, they framed her face, as though she were a picture.   
  
Severus had never looked at Lily like this before. She had always been doing something, and he would watch her from afar. Never had she looked him in the eyes as though he were a friend... an equal.  
  
They finished up their plates, and before they knew it, they had vanished back to the kitchen.  
  
Lily and Severus made their way back to the common rooms. When they got to the Slytherin house, Severus thanked Lily again, and left.   
  
Lily smiled, and let out a huge sigh. She walked slowly back towards the Gryffindor Tower, not a care in the world to get back so late.  
  
When she just about reached the portrait hole, Severus came running in.   
  
"Lily," he called, out of breath from running.  
  
"Severus! What's the matter?" she asked concerned.  
  
"I realized, they changed the password... I don't remember what it is." he said shamefully.  
  
Lily smiled. "Oh! I thought something had happened! That's no big deal."  
  
"Why? Do you know how to get into the Slytherin House?  
  
"Of course not. But that class room we were in, it's deserted. No one ever goes in there. You could sleep there, and no one would notice. Tomorrow is Saturday too, so there's no class." she explained.  
  
"I hate to be a bother."  
  
"No really, what do you need?"  
  
"I don't think I remember how to get back to that spot."  
  
"Oh! Sure, lets go."  
  
Severus felt a heating sensation in his chest. It was a mixture of embarrassment, guilt, and a desire to be near Lily. She was so incredible... and she didn't treat Severus like he was an outcast.  
  
They reached the classroom, and Lily showed Severus a good corner to snooze in.   
  
"What if someone should come in?"  
  
"I told you, it's not possible. This room isn't used."  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"Because... the pictures..."  
  
"The pictures?"  
  
"Yes. See, they sleep all day long, and when the professors are trying to teach, they are constantly interrupted by their snores, and if they move the pictures to another room, the pictures can't fall asleep, and they become very iritable. So they just leave them here to shut them up."  
  
"Ah"  
  
"Well, um, I guess goodnight."  
  
"Yeah..."  
  
Lily turned to walk away to the door. She put her hand on the door handle and turned back.  
  
"Are you sure you'll be okay here alone all night?"  
  
"I think I'll manage."  
  
"Because, I could stay for a little,"  
  
"You'd do that?"  
  
Lily kneeled down in front of Severus and smiled. "Of course."  
  
They sat and talked about everything they could think of. Both of them getting less and less tired as the night progressed.  
  
They somehow ended up playing Tell the Truth.  
  
"Tell the truth... you hate everyone in this school!" Lily asked, practically laughing herself silly.  
  
"I hate to say it, but I think you're not far off." Severus replied, laughing equally as hard.  
  
"Okay, okay! Your turn!"  
  
"...tell the truth, Lily, you adore Potter...?"  
  
Lily stopped laughing, and wiped the tears of laughter that streamed down her cheeks. She looked right at him, and sat up straight.  
  
"...no... I don't adore James. He's a good guy... but there are bigger fish in the sea."   
  
"I see.... your turn..."  
  
"Tell the truth..." she looked from his eyes to his lips, and without having to say another word, Severus raised a nervous hand to Lily's cheek, and leaned forward slowly.   
  
When his lips touched hers, something happened inside both of them. An electrifying current that ran through every muscle in them. Severus felt his eyes seal shut, and begged him to keep them that way forever. Lily felt the urge to be nearer to him. She picked herself up onto her knees, lips still gently rubbing against Severus', and crawled as close to him as she could get. Severus put both hands on either side of her face, and slowly slid them down along her shoulders, down her arms, to her hands, and onto her waist. Lily's hands found themself comfortably placed around his neck, playing with the long hair he kept contained in a hair-binder. She removed the hair binder and let his hair freely wander at his shoulders, while keeping her hands and fingers well hidden inside.  
  
She could feel Severus' breathing getting more and more intense, as did their kisses. Severus leaned back to better support himself, but with the force of Lily following him, they both ended up lying on the floor, Lily on top of him from her waist up.  
  
They broke apart when Severus' head gently rested down on the cool stone floors, and as they stared at each other, unable to put anything to words, Lily ran her fingers down from his forehead to his chin, while Severus kept a sturdy hold around Lily's middle.  
  
Lily couldn't help but smile. Her night with Severus had been so much more enjoyable, so much more true, and unscripted. Severus had thought the same of Lily. He thought that for once, he wasn't thinking about what he was going to do or say next, they both just let the night happen moment to moment.  
  
They were both lying on a cold stone floor in a dark deserted class room in the early hours of the morning with snoring pictures of wizards all around them... But to them, they were just here and now.  
  
The next thing Severus knew, he was still lying on the floor, with a sunbeam coming through a window, directly onto his eyes. He sat up quickly, and realized that Lily was still lying on him. She slid down to his knees, and woke.  
  
"I'm sorry" he said nervously, afraid that she might hold it against him for being so careless.  
  
"It's okay." she replied groggily.  
  
"When did you fall asleep?"   
  
"About two hours after you did."  
  
Oops. Severus felt guilty that he didn't stay awake. He figured that he had enjoyed the feeling of her in his arms so much that it relaxed him and he must've just snoozed.  
  
"Er, I didn't mean to fall asleep on you..."  
  
"That's okay. Actually, I think it was ME that fell asleep on YOU." she said playfully.  
  
Severus chuckled, then looked sternly at her, raising an eyebrow. "You didn't violate me in my sleep, now did you?"  
  
"Oh! And what if I did Mr. Snape?"  
  
"That's PROFESSOR Snape to YOU!"  
  
"So! You're a professor now!?"  
  
"You're damn right. I'll be the greatest professor in this whole school. This will be my class room, and all will obey my word!"  
  
"And what class would that be? Astronomy? Potions? The Art of Snoozing?"  
  
Severus laughed and Lily sat up so she was sitting in his lap.  
  
"You will do kindly to not make jokes in my class room Miss Evans."  
  
"Sorry sir."  
  
"That's better! Now, today class I'll ask you to take out your text, turn to chapter three, and try to read through it while resting your head on fluffy pillows!"  
  
Lily exploded in a fit of giggles as Severus lowered his head and rested them on Lily's chest. Lily had not seen him act so flirtatious before, but she liked it... a lot. He was foul minded, and polite of her personal space at the same time.  
  
Lily cupped her hands under his chin to pull his face back to hers and kissed him. His lips moved so passionately against hers, that she didn't even move the rest of her body. Nor did he. All focus was used on the emotions that were passed through to each other by such a simple act.  
  
A loud noise coming from the halls caused them to break apart in curiosity. They both stood and made sure each other looked decent, then opened the class room door.  
  
It was just students heading to the great hall for breakfast. Lily and Severus glided into the stream of people walking, acting as though all along, they were just planning to have a little breakfast. 


	4. Chapter 4: Second Chance

Chapter 4  
  
Severus Snape Journal Entry, October 1st - day  
  
We spend breakfast sending owls to each other, as not to attract an annoyance from classmates that can't handle when a Gryffindor sits at the Slytheran table... and Gryffindor would have some clever way to get me detention if I tried to sit there. I couldn't help but think about the house elves that made all the food we consumed over the years. I bet they save a fortune using them. After breakfast, Lily insisted she had homework to catch up on. I wish I had been able to take her out, so that she could see what a REAL date should be.   
  
Before she left, I kissed her, and she wasn't embarrassed. I only wished HE could have seen the way she looked at me. Eat your heart out Potter.  
  
  
  
Hogwarts School, October 1st - day  
  
While Lily ate her breakfast, and giggled over notes that Severus sent her. (One being: "Nice robes. Did your mother pick them out?" to which she replied: "Shut up please, I'm trying to enjoy my eggs. P.s. no, my mother did not pick out my robes... my grandpa did. Maybe you know him, Dumbledore.")  
  
Their conversation turned from robes to Dumbledore being Lily's grandfather, to him being her GREAT grandfather, then just assuming he was old enough to be Adam or Eve's grandfather too.   
  
When Lily finished her breakfast, she didn't want to leave. She loved things this way. Why did something always have to change one's course of happy being?  
  
An enormous white and grey owl flew into the Great Hall, and landed elegantly in front of Lily. She laughed at the thought of Severus starting to send different owls, as though people would think that she was just really popular that morning, rather than the truth that Lily had an admirer.  
  
She untied the letter from the owl's leg, and unrolled the parchment. To Lily's surprise, the handwriting was not that of Severus'...   
  
It was from James.   
  
Her heart leapt as she hid the letter under the table so no one would see her reading it.  
  
She read the note twice before looking up, which read:  
  
Lily,   
  
I can't begin to tell you how embarrassed I am about our date.  
  
Let me make it up to you.  
  
Meet me at the portrait hole around 10 tonight.  
  
-James  
  
Lily thought about what he meant by the letter. How could he make it up to her? Were they going to go out again? Every student knows that they're not to leave Hogwarts after hours, and 10 at night was definetly out of the question.  
  
She also had that sickening feeling that she was going to have to bring money again for butter beers or something.   
  
Then the real feeling of sickness hit her.   
  
Severus.  
  
How was she to explain it to him? 'Sorry Sevie, I have another date. Wait up for me though, because I'll probably want to see you afterwards incase he's not enjoyable again.'  
  
Lily looked up at the Slytherin table to see if Severus was looking her way and possibly wondering why she wasn't responding to his last note about giving the Divination professor a dung flavored jelly bean. But he wasn't sitting at the table anymore.   
  
She looked around to see if he was on his way out the door, or maybe up talking to someone else. He wasn't. She crumpled up the note James sent her, and shoved it into the pocket of her robes. She grabbed her backpack and swirled around in her seat to stand up, and Severus was standing there behind her.  
  
"Oh! Severus! You startled me!" said Lily nervously.  
  
"I was wondering if you had been offended by my last letter. Because I did mean what I sad about our lovely Divination teacher... he's a complete disgrace, and he would be well deserving of a foul flavor of Bertie Botts beans." he replied.  
  
Lily giggled in relief. He had not seen the note.  
  
"Actually, I happen to agree with you whole heartedly." she said.  
  
"I knew you would." he said happily. "So, do you have time for another adventure tonight?"   
  
"Haha, yes, that was quite the adventure! Oh... but I have a lot of homework to catch up on..." she said hastily contemplating whether or not to meet James' request or not.   
  
"Oh..." said Severus in a manner that was clear to Lily that he thought she didn't really want to spend more time with him.   
  
The sound made Lily's heart sink.   
  
"I might be able to... late tonight. I don't know when... if you want." she said, trying to be reassuring.  
  
Severus smiled almost evilly.   
  
"I knew you couldn't resist me." he replied, and to Lily's surprise, he took one of her hands into his own and kissed it.   
  
Lily walked quickly back to the Gryffindor Tower. She had so much work to get done, as well as take the time to decide whether to meet James at 10, or just ditch out early and see Severus instead.   
  
All instincts told her to not meet with James... But when 10pm rolled around, Lily found herself sitting on the big plush couch in front of the fireplace.   
  
"Glad you could make it." said a voice from behind her.  
  
"Er, yeah. Me too." replied Lily. She stood up to see James in a tasteful muggle-like   
  
outfit that pleased Lily greatly. In his arm was a colorful cloak that Lily had never seen before.   
  
"Where did you get the cloak?" she asked him.  
  
James smiled and said nothing. Lily cocked her head to one side as she watched James flip the cloak around his shoulders. Everything but his head suddenly vanished. Lily covered her mouth as to keep herself from making a sound of shock.  
  
"How... what... how did you do that?" she asked bewildered.  
  
"It's an invisibility cloak. Pretty cool huh?" said James coolly.  
  
Lily couldn't deny the awesomeness of the invisibility cloak. She had head of such things in existence but never dreamed anyone she would ever know would own one. They were, after all, very rare.  
  
"So, are you ready to go then?" James asked her, removing the cloak and coming fully into view once more.  
  
"Go?" Lily asked, touching the robe's fabric in curiosity.  
  
"Well, we can't have a decent date in the common room, now can we? I though a nice little jaunt to Hogsmeade would suit us well. I know a way to get there quickly." he explained.  
  
"You mean...? Oh... Yes, I see. We hide under the cloak and sneak out, right? And no one will ever know we broke SCHOOL RULES... is that about it?" she asked, eyebrows raised.  
  
James thought about it a minute, wondering if this was a trick question. But finally he replied, "Yep. That's about it."  
  
A smile spread across Lily's face. "Let's go." 


	5. Chapter 5: Invisible

***A Comment from Arielle: Huzzah for being sick all day. I slept and made another short chapter to the story. I don't like reading long ass chapters, so I don't write them that way either. Hope it's somewhat enjoyable, and I'll do my best to write more asap.***  
  
Severus Snape Journal Entry, October 2nd - Late Night  
  
Just when you think you have everything under control, something comes along and changes it completely. I can't decide whether it is for the good or the bad sometimes. Last night's events aroused some very difficult questions I am forced to answer to myself. Just how close am I willing to be with Lily...?  
  
P.s. I stuffed Sirius Black's mashed potatoes with Kelps Extra Sticky Rubber Bands at lunch yesterday. He was sent to the nurse, and I think I may have put Kelps out of business. A shame too. I was making a list of all the people I would like to see without the ability to speak.  
  
Hogwarts School, October 2nd - Late Evening  
  
Severus sat on the windowsill looking out at the grounds that were now being darkened by sunset. The sun had begun to set a little earlier now, which Severus liked very much. He preferred the dark over the daytime sun, and the teachers no longer pestered him about being out of Slytherin House after hours, since he would only do it again the next night and the next. After a while, they just assumed he was the creative type, and since he was doing no one harm, they simply told any questioning student that he was on a special night watch to make sure kids weren't sneaking around the corridors.  
  
It worked too. People didn't want to come in contact with Severus, so they stayed in their dormitories.  
  
Severus flinched a little when he heard a rustling in the hallways. Two whispering voices could barely be made out. Severus held his breath to hear the people talking, and as they got closer and closer, he could clearly make out a girl and a boy. The girl was speaking quickly and sporadically, trying very carefully not to be very specific as to what they were in fact talking about.  
  
"I'm sorry... I know... I don't expect you to say anything, I just... I don't know... I just thought I should tell you." said the boy.  
  
"Oh, yeah... I mean, I know that. It was just really... unexpected... and maybe a little fast" replied the girl.  
  
"But you see, to me it wasn't fast. I've been holding out on saying anything at all." said the boy.  
  
"I know..."  
  
"Did... did you really mean what you said though... about..."  
  
"Look, I don't want to talk about it now... okay?" the girl asked.  
  
Silence.   
  
Severus leaned against the wall. He heard the footsteps of the couple coming closer, and then stop just around a corner.   
  
"Lily, please... I want to talk about it." said the boy.  
  
"No... I'm sorry James. I'm just not in the mood. I don't know what I'm thinking about, and I don't want to end up saying the wrong thing." replied Lily.  
  
"Li-"  
  
"Just go back to the common room, James."   
  
James made attempts to reply to her, but nothing came out. He finally began walking away, and just as he was passing the window where Severus sat, he caught him mumble, "Women..." to himself.  
  
When Severus believed James to be out of earshot, he sat up tall and looked down the halls for Lily. He knew she was still there. He leaned as far as he could to see around the corner, but she was standing with her back against the wall.  
  
He held his breath again to try to hear any noise coming out of her, but she was silent as the stone floors under them.  
  
He contemplated whether or not to go to her. He feared that he would be imposing on her personal situation, and maybe she would even be offended that he was eavesdropping on them.   
  
"He told me he loved me." Lily said out of nowhere, still leaning against the wall.  
  
Severus looked around, and waited to find out if she was talking to him, or someone else who happened to walk by quietly. After it was apparent that there was no one else in the halls, he replied quietly, "What did you say back?"  
  
Lily turned the corner and faced him, her face looking tired and stressed. She gave a weak attempt at a smile, that Severus knew meant she had once again had a hell of a date with James.  
  
"Severus... I'm-" she started  
  
"You don't have to be sorry, Lily. You are perfectly entitled to go out with Potter." he replied.  
  
"I know... it just felt wrong."  
  
"Not surprising."  
  
"No, I mean... I felt like I was..." she sighed, and tried to think of the words to finish her thought. "Like I was forcing myself to have a good time. Tonight was... worlds better than the last time we went out. But the only time I really laughed because I wanted to, was when he told me about Sirius, and how he could only open his mouth to talk out of one side. I laughed so hard... because I was thinking about you."  
  
Severus said nothing.  
  
"We walked back towards school, and we stopped by the lake to look for the giant octopus. The lake was so beautiful, and the trees were rustling... and he just all of a sudden turned to me and said that he loved me! I didn't know what to say! I was so shocked!"  
  
Severus couldn't help but smile... in a sort of evil fashion.   
  
"What?" Lily asked when she got a look at him.  
  
"It just sounds like something Potter would do."he finally said.  
  
"Oh... yeah..."  
  
There was a long pause of silence.   
  
"Well, I'd better go to bed then." said Lily.  
  
Severus didn't say anything, as she began to walk away.  
  
"You never told me what you said back to him" he called to her, already halfway down the hall.  
  
At this, Lily stopped and turned around. Severus looked calm and undisturbed. His hands were clutched behind his back, and the thought of Potter kissing the same lips he had made his grip tighten and cause his knuckles to go white.  
  
Lily walked back to where she stood before, looked Severus right in his eyes, and without having to say a word, Severus reached out and pulled Lily close to him. When their lips met, Lily let out a sigh, and leaned into his embrace. She stood high on her toes to reach Severus' height, and even so he had to hunch down a bit to accommodate. It was different to kiss him standing up, she thought. He had the ability to really hold her this way. Lily could even sense that he was in the lead this time with his tall stature, and though there wasn't much meat on his bones, Lily felt completely safe there with him.  
  
Lily took a step back and looked at him and smiled.  
  
"Goodnight Lily." he said.  
  
"Goodnight Severus." she replied, and slowly walked towards Gryffindor Tower, glancing back at him every few steps or so.  
  
Severus sat comfortably back on his windowsill, and grinned.   
  
"I can hear you breathing Potter." he said softly.  
  
James removed the cloak and threw it to the ground. Severus looked down at the crumpled cloak on the stone floor.   
  
"I would think you would take better care of something so valuable." Severus said calmly, looking back out the window.  
  
"You're a thief." said James.  
  
"I beg your pardon? I don't have anything that belongs to you." said Severus cooly.  
  
"What about her? Huh? You knew I liked her. Everyone knows." cried James.  
  
"Yes, you're right. I knew." he replied.  
  
"Then you did it to spite me."  
  
"On the contrary, Potter. She came to me."  
  
"You lie."  
  
"I assure you. I did nothing to attract Lily to me. I was here, and she came to me."  
  
James shook his head, not wanting to believe it, but knew somehow that Severus was telling the truth. He tried to think of something to say to him, something to do to make him as angry as he felt, but nothing came to him. He swiped his cloak up in one arm and turned back towards Severus, who still sat on the windowsill, calm and reserved.  
  
"This isn't the end of this, Severus." he said, trying to sound more bad-ass than he really was.  
  
"Oh goodie." Severus replied quiet enough for only himself to hear. 


End file.
